Friday, May 21, 2010

S*#@ My Kids Ruined

I stumbled across this site called Shit My Kids Ruined the other day, and laughed and laughed and laughed....They claim that they are THE STRONGEST VISUAL BIRTH CONTROL ON THE MARKET TODAY.  I believe it!  If you want a chuckle, go check it out!  Here are a couple of gems from the site...
Black paint spilled on an oriental carpet.  OUCH.

It wasn't me!

As I said, I laughed and laughed...but then the giggles and my feeling of smugness began to wear off as I began remembering moments when my own children were younger.  As luck would have it, I didn't "capture" the memories (probably because I was busy screaming/cussing/crying and occasionally laughing) when...

*Clay climbed onto the bathroom counter and tried to shampoo his own hair (age 2?)...he was covered in shampoo.  Everywhere.  All over the bathroom.

*  Clay, supposedly potty trained, age 5, deciding to stand in his doorway and see how far he can "shoot".  Yes, I discovered this days later.  With my nose.

*  Paige, age 4, deciding to cut holes in her brand new pink down comforter.  Mommy was NOT happy.

* Paige, age 3-5, deciding that the world is her canvas.  Specifically, my walls.  And carpet.  She said she "couldn't find any paper."

* Paige, age 6, leaving a brand new shirt on top of Honey the hamster's cage.  Discovered in the morning when the shirt had humongous holes in it.  Mommy was NOT happy.

* Paige and her friend "C" (age 4-ish?) playing with soap and shampoo (still not sure why - maybe shampooing Barbie?) and then trying to clean up the evidence with...toilet paper.  Which naturally, disintegrated and clogged up the soapy, messy sink even more.

*  Me, in a Martha Stewart-y moment of weakness, trying to make sugar cookies (from scratch - told you it was Martha Stewart's fault!) with a 2 year old and a 4 year old.  Then creating even more wonderful Mommie Dearest memories by screaming at them when the flour and sugar started flying all over the kitchen.

*  Too many broken...well, mention.

* Lots of "oops" items flushed down the toilet.  And the resulting mess.

*Broken VCR.  FYI, peanut butter sandwiches aren't supposed to go in the little slot.

* Clay, age 13 (!) - kept leaving the brand new laptop his grandmother got him for Christmas on the floor.  Mom and Dad, who obviously don't know anything, kept telling him not to do this.  Both Clay and the dog stepped on the laptop one night, the screen was shattered, and Clay no longer has a laptop.  

I DID manage to preserve one of these SMKR moments for posterity though.  It happened quite recently.  Perhaps you remember this....

If you missed the original post, you can read all about it by clicking here.


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